Are You Willing to Change?
In order to make lasting changes in your life, you must be willing to change. Whether it is your personal habits, your business or your participation in shaping the course of our nation, your ability to visualize what you want and take steps towards it, relies upon your willingness. Change is happening all the time, sometimes seemingly without our individual attention. It is happening in the government, economic structure, our bodies and in the universe. So, if change is going to happen anyway then why must you be willing? Because you are a part of the change that is happening, but you have a choice of how that change will feel. It may feel out of your control or even of your capability to think clearly, let alone take a stand; or you may be someone who has been propelled into action with a strong feeling of resistance.
Resistance to change is going to bring you more resistance; it is a given that the energy you resonate with is the energy that will show up. This is not to say that resistance is a bad thing or a good thing. It can propel us towards a solution or it can become a stuck emotion. You get to decide what you want to do with it. If you do nothing about your resistance, it doesn’t mean it isn’t still there. You will have a better outcome with change if you can create an intention to let go of your resistance. That means letting go of the outcome and living in the energy of the creation. Whew! Tall order when you have been conditioned to always be checking your progress. Tall order when you are looking at what is happening and you want so very badly for it to be something else. Tall order when you are constantly considering the opinions of others in regards to your intention.
Should vs. Desire
Having an intention without resistance is much easier if you start with something small.
Since the focus of your attention (feeling) will be your experience, you want to get really familiar with what it is you are feeling and most important, your self-talk. When you are trying to live up to an expectation, your own or someone else’s, you end up blurring the lines between a deep burning desire within and something that you think you should do. There is a difference. The words, “I should” creates an energy that is obligatory and carries a much lower vibration (feeling) than, “I have a deep burning desire to”. The latter produces an energy of creation, of inspiration and even acceptance that what is intended shall be answered. In this case, there is no need to live up to an expectation. You are free to create and free to be wrapped up in the moment you are in. On the contrary, when you recognize that you have a deep yearning for something and insist on seeing the result now, you shut down your ability to create. You have left no room for process. Instead of taking the steps (most of them energetic, some of them actions), you sit in the energy of “I should” or “Where is it, when is it coming and I want it now“, and any action you do take is going to attract more of the feeling of insistence, resistance and unfulfillment.
You want your actions to come from a place of feeling good. Your intended outcome might not look exactly like you envision but it will match the feeling you are in when you focus upon it. So, when you are driven to do something but have resistance, get feeling good first then start on your merry way of action. Start by thinking about things that bring you pleasure. It could be nature, your children, music, your lover or even your new warm socks! Then, once you feel good, touch upon that which you want to change. Go into your action feeling good, do what you can and then get out when your resistance takes over. You’ll know by the way you feel. Don’t let anyone else dictate how much, how little or how often you put your attention on the changes you are willing to make. This method applies to all changes. You can use it around changing your diet, your politics, your income and your health. The minute your action becomes a “should”, step away and go back in when it is a burning desire again and you feel good about it.
You are your #1 asset – Take care of you!
You have everything you need inside of you to make changes. You were perfectly designed to be on the planet at this time with your unique set of skills and gifts. It is your job to tune in to who you really are so that you can make the most of your time while you’re here. Your body is one big energetic divining rod; equipped to guide you on your path, but you might not have been taught to honor your feelings. You were probably discouraged from using your intuition and may have been told you were too sensitive a long time ago. Even if you know better now, it can be challenging to go with what you “feel”. Your feelings are the key to knowing what you are including in your vibrational field. For you to become familiar with what your intuition and body are telling you, you must be willing to spend time with yourself on a regular basis and practice self-care. A wonderful way to tune into your body is by receiving massage and energy work or by incorporating some of the following practices:
- Quiet time without the input from others (this is essential)
- Daily mediation
- Walking in silence, alone, every day (or with someone else if you both commit to the silence)
- Journaling every morning
- Repeating affirmations
Just try to commit to at least one practice, then find a person who will help you stay on track every day for a solid 30-days. That will be enough time to make a new habit that you are likely to stay with if it works for you.
At some point, you may find you need help from a professional to assist with change. You have established years of thinking patterns that have become beliefs causing you to forget how powerful a creator you really are. You have forgotten that you really can think, act and feel differently about your life and that you can manifest change. Your attention to your own vibration is essential to the well-being of this interwoven fabric that is our universe. It isn’t necessary or even helpful for you to think you have to change someone else (tempting as that is) for circumstances to improve. It is for the greater good that we all consider the changes we can make in ourselves. That may seem to be in contrast to taking care of each other and our world, however that comes from a lack consciousness that has permeated our existence. It comes from a void of faith in the power that created us and supports us to be joyful, harmonious beings. The only way to truly contribute to and take part in the abundance of this universe is through love. It has to start with you. You probably have a lot of old feelings that creep in and tell you that you are not enough in some way-not smart enough, rich enough, attractive enough, on and on and on. You may have some inner-child wounds that need to be addressed. It may be time to peel the scab off from the wounds and transform the pain into something useful. It is a part of being willing to change; the letting go of the old story of how we have been injured. They are the excuses we use for not stepping fully into our lives.
Here is a personal story about a shift in my own thinking and energy around a form of exercise:
I always had an instinctual pull towards yoga. When I was twelve years old, I bought a book that had a few yoga poses in it and for a few months I tried them out. I didn’t have the discipline or the support to make it a practice at that time. Fast forward 20 years later, I signed up for a class at a Community Recreation program which revived my interest and desire to be a yogi. I practiced with tapes at home on my VCR (yes, many years ago!) and thus began my on again, off again spurts of yoga practice. I never lost my love for yoga, but my life wasn’t always conducive to a practice (or so I thought).
Like many practices I had in my life and let slip, I would consider starting back to yoga but instead of concentrating on how good doing yoga made me feel, my resistance to it was stronger than my desire for it. I would think of all the reasons why I couldn’t fit it in. The real reason being fear. Fear that I wouldn’t be able to do it. Fear that I would have to be in a class with others who were better at it. Fear that I would again, start and stop. Another disappointment to myself and a “failure” in my black and white idea of who I was. My thinking had me being a person who “should” do yoga and sometimes even a person who “wanted” to do yoga. Going to yoga class became a “should” in my energy field.
The longing didn’t go away, and in fact, was so strong that about five years ago I became willing to change. I knew that I had to be willing to change and what had to change first was how I was thinking (which created my feelings). I knew I wanted to feel good about my yoga practice. I had to work with my thoughts and feelings to transform that “should” into a burning desire to include yoga in my life on a regular basis. I had a script for getting myself to class even when I didn’t feel like going. My higher self would remind me,” This is something you deserve, not something you must do.” Once I started going to class, I reinforced my feelings by reminding myself how good I felt every time I left yoga class. I began to notice all the ways in which my life felt better on the days I made it to yoga. I allowed the wisdom of yoga to speak to me and noticed subtle changes in the way I moved my body while I worked. I began to embrace myself as a yogi. Finally, I was feeling awesome about yoga!
However, that all changed this past March when we moved the clocks ahead and I had a really hard time adjusting to the time change. My sleep pattern was off. I was waking up in the middle of the night and staying awake for hours and then falling back to sleep just before the alarm would go off. The practice of going to early morning classes had worked for me previously but over the spring and into the summer my practice became less consistent. I didn’t stop going completely, yet I was giving in to sleeping in, slowly allowing the energy of not going become my more predominate feeling. I have changed enough in my thinking that I was determined above all else to not beat myself up if I didn’t make it to class. I tried fitting it in at different times of the day, but that didn’t work well. I was still doing yoga, just not as often and I could feel it slipping away. I lamented and listened for my wise-woman higher self to help me get to yoga. Instead, she helped me to love myself even if I didn’t make it to class. She reminded me that I had built up integrity with myself and that I acted much more in-line with who I really am these days and that if I wasn’t living up to my intentions that I would find my way back. Finally, in September, there came a week when I didn’t practice yoga at all. I could feel the changes in my body from not practicing. I was stiffer and not moving as easily. I mentioned it to someone after class the next time I went and she said she too had been having trouble keeping up her practice. I had been seeing this woman at yoga for over 4 years and only knew her first name. Until that conversation, I hadn’t realized that anyone else there was having a difficult time showing up at class. I considered yoga a very personal experience. I was a little resistant to include anyone else in my decision to go or not to go, but I was willing to change. I decided to ask her if she would be my yoga buddy by texting each other at night, saying, “I am going to yoga in the morning. Will I see you there?” She agreed and it has worked! We don’t make each other go and we don’t convince or shame each other for going or not going. We have just created someone we can be accountable to and for now, it is working. Yay!
The things that were a shift for me to make this change was:
- I stopped telling myself the story that I always quit on things that are good for me
- My self-talk was always loving even when I wasn’t living up to my own expectations
- I relied on my own wisdom and integrity to find a way back
- I asked for help
So, I ask you, is there something in your life that you have a burning desire to change? Are you willing to let go of the old story? Are you willing to change? If yes, then start with something small and get some help, if needed, on an emotional, spiritual, physical or mental level. Even one step perpetuates big changes, but you have to choose to start someplace and come at it from a place of feeling good first.
Elizabeth Jackson LMT, RMT is a licensed professional Massage Therapist and Energy Worker who enjoys assisting others to achieve their own aspects of well-being through body and energy work. She owns and operates the Center for Balanced Living and Body & Soul Health Solutions offering Massage Therapy, Reiki sessions, Craniosacral Therapy, Tarot Readings and EFT sessions. She also facilitates regular Reiki Shares, group meditations and workshops in Self-Care Health Care. Check out Elizabeth’s practice: Body & Soul Health Solutions on Facebook or at: www.bodysoulmassagereiki.com and www.mainecenterforbalancedliving.com.